Dial B for Booty

I went to the "other LYS" today (I'm pleased to say they were very nice) and bought a beautiful skein of cashmere yarn for a pair of booties I've been meaning to make for a friend's new baby. Of course, I wasn't going to risk a $25 skein of cashmere yarn on something I'd never made regardless of its ease, I had to test the little bootie pattern with some crap from the stash. After all, as Yarn Harlot's book diagnosed, I'm a Scientific Knitter. I liked it so much I gave it a little bow with a length of Tiffany ribbon. I think it's really sweet but alas, it will have no pair, not while there's cashmere in the house!

I learned yesterday that Estelle Getty had passed away. She was beloved by millions of TV viewers -- including me. I love the Golden Girls and still watch it regularly. She will be dearly missed in these parts but remembered always. In her honor, tell a colorful story tomorrow! Arrivederci, Sophia!

Yarn Porn, Dinner Porn & WTF

Knitting Essentials first! My purchase from Ironjohn04 arrived in the mail a few days ago and I couldn't be more pleased. My niece wanted socks in exactly these colors so the search is on for a pattern that won't be lost in the colorway. Any suggestions? Now don't get carried away, I've only made one pair of stockinette socks so we can't be getting too technical or intricate. Don't forget how little help I have here in the knitting mecca that is Florida when I run into a problem.

My second bit of porn was dinner tonight. It's my new favorite meal, I call it Lemon Shrimp Pasta and it's a Rachel Ray creation with protein. You take chicken stock, soy sauce and sliced, zested lemons and let that go a while. When the pasta is almost done you add some shrimp to the mix and add the drained pasta. Throw in the reserved zest and some chives! It's so simple, bright and fresh. I love it and have it regularly these days. When there's whole wheat pasta in the house, it's actually pretty healthy!

And finally, WTF is growing all over the lawn? These disgusting mushrooms are popping up all over the well-manicured lawns of my community. They're ugly and mushy and yet another piece of proof that Florida has the worst, hot, sticky, and frighteningly humid weather on the planet. Too strong?

Bon appetit and happy knitting!

Back in Business!

The pleasant clicking of needles is back at Chez Knitguyla. I'm pleased to report that after months of pondering why my knitting mojo was lost, I concluded that I needed to stop worrying about mojo and knit something, anything, and it would right itself. Although the act of knitting itself has been non-existent, pattern hunting and project ideas have been swarming all over the place. I have great friends who are expecting their first baby ... soon! I've been trying to find the right project but one that I could do on my own. By now, everyone knows there's little help from the local knitting community (and I use that termed lightly) in this area. I found this lovely faux-cable pattern that was interesting so I decided to try it.
It's not a baby blanket but it's turning into a fun little kitchen towel.

On other knitting fronts, I read Knitting Rules by famed blogger and author Stephanie Pearl-McPhee. It's a clever little book and a really fun and quick read. There's a section where she classifies knitters. I won't list them here as I don't want to be sued by the Yarn Harlot for reproducing her work but according to her, I'm a Scientist knitter but verging on a Pretender since I haven't really been knitting. Well that lit a fire under my ass! And a fine ass it's becoming but that's another post about my new exercise routine and my new bike I call Gert! This post is the result.

Thank you Yarn Harlot!

Completely Random

just hysterical!

Frogging

That's all I seem to do these days. The frustration level is getting higher and worse yet, getting to me. I miss Edith. There, I said it. When I lived in L.A., I'd often make a mistake and simply head over to Ventura Blvd. the next day and get it fixed and merrily continue on with my project. Tonight I tried to knit back, gave up and tried frogging a few rows but I couldn't get that damn needle back in appropriately. Again, 30 rows are gone and I'm left with a beautiful ball of yarn. I love the yarn but loved my project more.

I hate my LYS, every time I bring something in to be fixed she looks at me like I have 10 heads. It goes something like this...

LYS Owner: What kind of stitches are these?

Me: Trust me it's not that complicated, here's the pattern.

LYS Owner: A pattern, why don't you just do garter stitches.

Me: I like a little variety.

LYS Owner: I think you need to start over.

ME: Why?

LYS Owner: Because you can't fix this when there are all these stitches in there.

Me: I know I can't fix it that's why I've come to the woman who owns the yarn store and is supposed to be an expert.

LYS Owner: Why, we just knit garter stitch dishcloths and fun fur scarves.

Me: I hate you.

LYS Owner: Honey, here's some cotton, go wild!

Me: Die.

Okay, that last part's just in my head.

It's so frustrating but this too shall pass. Luckily, I had some diversions this weekend. I had a blast in South Beach! The east coast is beautiful and the ocean is so different than the gulf, although much cooler. I even got a lot of sun - unheard of for me. It's sexy on me, too bad it kills you. I loved the drive across the Alley as long as I didn't open the windows. Who knew there were so many mosquitos in the Everglades? I saw an alligator, ate tremendous Cuban food and met a few skimpy bathing suits.

Enough of that, it's time to cast on, AGAIN!

Ants in My Pants

Well, it's been an interesting Tuesday/Wednesday weekend at casa knitguyla. I woke up at 5:00am itching all over. The laptop was on the bed (left over from the night before - listen to the Y knit podcast, it's great) so I opened the monitor to cast a little light on the situation. I was half asleep but figured I was having an allergic reaction to seafood or something like that. What I discovered was a horror show of ants crawling all over the laptop, bed and ME! Within 30 seconds every light was on, I was dancing around stripping my bedcloths off as quickly as I could and into the shower I went.

After scalding myself in the shower to a beet red skin color, I went to survey the situation. Yes, there were in fact ants all over my bedroom. Strip the bed, curtains, and every piece of clothing within a 12 foot radius of the epicenter. 10 loads of laundry later and bleach washing everything in sight, they weren't leaving. Hours later, I discovered a pot pourri and dried fruit basket that I had under the sink and shrink wrapped since I received it. I found it under the bed and unshrink-wrapped. Once that was tossed out the window, I started to win the battle. The cleaning lady decided that the smell would permeate the room from under the bed. Can you say welcome back to El Salvador!

I sprayed, trapped and battled ants in hand to hand combat and it was finally over. I'm still doing laundry, you have no idea how much time it takes to dry a pillow!

With that done, I was off to the spa. There's nothing that a salt glow, healing wrap, anti-aging (yes, shut up) anti-aging facial and an 80 minute massage can't fix. In the locker room, trying not to drown in the 12 head shower, I was still feeling the itchy remnants of my fright fest so I had a pedicure just for good measure. I'm glowing and silky smooth with no one to touch me so I'll be signing off now, to touch myself!

Movie Fest

With a weekend of nothing to do, I spent the weekend in my jammies, watched films, ate oreos and not much else. The "what not to rent" list goes something like this...

Cloverfield - It's Godzilla meets the Blair Witch Project. It made me sort of nauseous with all that camera jumping but once you get used to it, it's just gross but engaging enough to see whose going to expire next.

Juno - I feel as though I shouldn't say anything negative about this one since everyone seemed to love it but kids with vocabularies way beyond their years and families who have it all figured out just rub me the wrong way. Don't get me wrong, I loved the cast and Juno herself was a hoot but it's so unrealistic to think any family would just stroll into their teen's unplanned pregnancy with such aplomb!

The Mist - a Steven Spielberg thriller that had me going right up until the end and then it's all...ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? You'll have to see it for yourself.

And that wraps up another exciting weekend in sunny, sweltering Florida! There was swimming while I was still clean, everyone needs a little vitamin D. I cleaned the garage, the car actually fits in it now, laundry and a lot of vacuuming that went on for 20 minutes until I realized it wasn't working because there wasn't a bag in the damn thing! The carpet's still a mess, I gave up instantly after the no bag incident was discovered.

Oh, and P.S. I Love You. No, not you, the movie. The ultimate in sappy, romantic films. Yes, I cried and cried and I loved it. I love romance, sweeping images of places I've never seen, handsome men with accents and hopeful, happy endings.

Oh, yeah and I knit some. This is still a knitting blog!

Birthday Celebrations!

Yes, this weekend I turned 44 but as I was told by a friend ... I'm within 10 pounds of my college weight, I have all my hair and I'm gainfully employed! I only really cared about the hair ... okay, and maybe the weight. Fine, I'm superficial at 44! And if you have anything to say about it, remember, I'm officially old enough to be a bitchy queen, fine, getting older has nothing to do with it!


Hey, life's a journey and I've learned a lot over the past year so I'll just laugh my way into middle-aged-dom instead of anything else -- thank you very much! J.

New Experiences?

I did two things today that I never do. I bought a live plant and really cheap yarn. There's green thumbs and then there's mine - the royalty of black thumbs. I can't keep a plant alive to save my life but my little lanai needed a little some some (as my ex used to say). It's an adorable little thing. They call it a Hawaiian Schefflora whatever that means. All I know is it needs plenty of water and medium light. I just thought it was pretty. I'll keep you posted.

On the yarn front, today I went through the stash which constitutes about 40-50 skeins of yarn - amazingly soft alpacas and sublime sock yarn from Lorna's Laces yet my umph to hear the click of needles was not stirred. I don't know if it's the heat of the unending Summer that Florida experiences or my lack of concentration which is expended entirely at work these days. So in Walmart searching for a window shade and a trash can, I saw the yarn section. I didn't even know they had a yarn section; which was filled with gynormous skeins of Lion Brand and the like. I have nothing against Lion Brand yarns, I just think the feel of the yarn in your hands is part of the experience. Regardless, two skeins of $1.27 Peaches & Creme yarn unknowingly jumped into my basket and a dishcloth was born. Simple, uncomplicated and already on the needles. I could be back!

On a side note, the lovely little lady working in the craft department looked at me like I was crazy when I asked her to find a matching dyelot. A dye-what she exclaimed which made me smile. Yes Toto, we're not in Kansas anymore.

Happy Earth Day!